There’s no doubt that being in your twenties is an awkward age. For me, being 23 going on 24 means I am at a place where some of my friends are getting married and having babies while the other half are partying every weekend. Me? Well, I don’t fit in any one of those categories. And now, it feels sort of weird to not be doing any of those. I recently graduated college. I am an artist and photographer trying to run her own business, which keeps me on my toes, all while trying to keep creating art. I do not really care for partying, although I am down for some wine and relaxing. I was in a committed relationship where future plans were thought of but since the single life, eh, it hasn’t been so fruitful.
It is awkward when you don’t fit into any of these categories and you’re still trying to figure life out. Don’t get me wrong, I thoroughly enjoy seeing my friends from high school getting engaged, married, and having little ones (adorable I might add!). But with it happening so much, it does feel like I am a bit behind. Even though I am almost 24, I am relatively still young and have plenty of time to get married and have kids. I can’t help it at times but feel a step behind. Here I am single, not even remotely close to picking out rings or planning a wedding or showing off my baby bump. The closest I get is the characters I fall in love with in my books, that is the closest I have reached!
Then you have your super successful friends who seem to live this wonderful life full of travels, great friends, and a great job. They may be single or in a committed relationship but they just have this awesome life where they are constantly doing something. I am always wondering how are their lives so fabulous and how the heck do they afford to travel?! I can barely go into my backyard (this is a joke) without being broke LOL. Sure I finished school so there should be so much more time for me to hang out and all but I don’t.
And I think that is my problem. I could have all of these things. Obviously some things such as marriage and kids and my own house will come with time but I could live a better life. Not that my life is horrible, it could be a lot worse. But maybe it is an awkward transition for me. I left my college and was a part of a community where I was surrounded by like minded people and was always doing something. Once I graduated, it was like I lost all of that. In return means I left my friends and the sense of community. Majority of my friends from CI stayed closer to there or went back home. I went back home which is almost 2 hours away.
I never believed I was ordinary. I always planned to live an extraordinary life filled with wonder, fun, adventure, and happiness. And sure, it is not always going to be like that but I wanted that. I still do. So maybe instead of getting sucked into the corner of self pity were I constantly compare myself to my other twenty-something counterparts, I should actually focus on my life and do what I want to do, whatever that may be.
And I should stop drooling over social media so much. Perhaps get out of my fortress of solitude under my comfort of blankets and Netflix (no matter how great is). And get out to make more friends! I am a social butterfly and I am shocked I don’t have more people to hang out with. If I want to travel, maybe I should look up places and prices and work towards planning a trip.
I realize I spend so much of my life wishing I could have a life like my counterparts instead of using that time and energy to actively create the life I want. It’s a new chapter in my life. I am educated, single, and carefree. God knows why it is taking so long to actually go forth with it. To anyone experiencing what I am feeling, make a conscious decision to make your life what you want it. You only have 10 years to be in your twenties so make it count. They say they are supposed to be the best years of your life. Let’s make it great! 😀